Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.
GO.
What a day. What a roller coaster of emotions!!
Ending on an OK note though, so I guess life is pretty good.
What is considered a "horrible lie?"
Been asking myself a lot of questions. Been questioning everything. Surprise, surprise.
I find, that with every birthday, I get a little more honest. I don't think it's a bad thing to be honest. Ami right? Brutally honest is another thing. But it's better than lying I think. Probably for the bad lies. You don't wanna sugar coat things. Especially when you're telling a huge lie. Day by day. More and more lies. Maybe the truth really will set you free. But are you being a good person? Are you in the right, for telling so many harsh lies to keep others happy? Is that selfless? Or just plain stupid?
What happens when its your family? Do you lie to protect them? Or are you actually causing more problems for yourself? I just told you how honest I'm being. So clearly, I'm not the one lying. I just have a hard time deciding which side I'm on. Happy on the pappy lying side. You are being a good person. But I'm not happy, because you're a liar. And hiding.
Relief and then grit. There's no easy solution to life. There's no easy solution to problems. Everyone's got em. All is fair in love and war. Or maybe it's the opposite... thoughts?
There's nothing really fair about it. How do you deal with a broken heart? I can't even begin to love again. Picking up the pieces is just the first part of it. I'm not ready to be warm again. I can't deal with someone's baggage if they can't accept mine. Which, everyone's got it.
"Never love anything that can't love you back."
And that just broke it...
"My abandoned heart. Just doesn't understand. My undying love for you. Won't let me wait."
Its not bad to be honest or brutally honest. Personally i think its quite healthy to lay it all out on the line. Sometimes the truth hurts.. but finding the truth out later after a lie has failed hurts worse. I wouldn't worry about that. Lying on the other hand is a tricky subject to decode. When to lie, who to lie to, who to protect with a lie.. all complicated. I don't like liars.. i used to be a hardcore liar and now i hate it.. but sometimes you have to lie to protect the ones closest to you including family. Somethings some people aren't supposed to know or shouldn't know... but again how far will you take it? In the end the liar is the one ultimately carrying the baggage now.. but how much baggage can said person keep contained before they lose their composure.
ReplyDeleteMending a broken heart isn't easy and i don't think there is any one solution. For me.. if this helps.. Time is the biggest factor but i find new things to do with my life. Surround myself with those that matter most to me, do things i love to do and eventually i'll move on. Its never easy.. but at the same time if you really want to move on... fight for that freedom. Just keep on keep'in on.. and one day you'll wake up and realize.. your heart is fully beating and its the start of a new day and chapter!!
Great Post.. loved it.. gives me so much to think about on my drive to work this morning!!! Awesome, hah.
I love honestly. You don't have anything to worry about it your life. Nothing to really "remember"
ReplyDeleteTime is 100% the solution. But its something you have to reaaaally commit to. It's easy to get into old habits or start rationalizing your thoughts.
Glad it's something to think about... I can't turn my thoughts off sometimes. Good thing about blogging... LET IT FLOW! :D