Share it.

Where are you? I know where. BUT, why do I feel toyed with? Does it look like a play games?

I don't. I really don't want to play games. What ever happened to the decent men in the world? One out of a million, right?

RIGHT.

Many new things as of late. Motion after motion. Day after day. There's been a shift in the universe. Instead of just living and breathing, I'm starting to soar again. My drive is back. So is my stride. Which is a huge relief.

Fully Alive. I'm ashamed of all my somethings.


Everything passes. I just didn't think you would. You pass on me. Now I'm starting to pass over you. Give me something to work with and I might be able to tolerate you a little more. You've given me nothing. Nothing but words.

GOSH! I have to be bipolar. As much as I want to see the actions, it's not supposed to be! Why oh whhhyyyyyy do I want something and will immediately have regret from it. I have regret from just thinking about it. Maybe I should give you more credit than what I do. This is the best thing. There's some things that should never happen. Don't dabble in this. You always know the answer.


Everyone has their secrets. But shouldn't you be honest with yourself? Your secrets will set you free.

Set yourself free.

Deep breath,

Angela

En français.

I never took French in high school, but I really do love the language. I can hardly speak it. I can somewhat read it, but I'll never get sick of listening to it. I have a cd/dvd set of all these amazing lessons on french. I just can't get out these syllables and sounds! Too hard on the mouth. :)

Life is good. This is life. When all things are down. There's no where else to go but up. Thinking about officially forgetting about everything. Getting rid of all the things. ALL THE THINGS! :D I think it's for the best. There's nothing wrong with starting fresh, forgetting about everything and moving on with life.

My type is changing. I have come across so many amazing people in the last couple of months I can't even stop wondering what if. I am so happy. I'm meeting new people, doing fun things and living my life. Why did I ever live in such a love-less, annoying atmosphere. Remind me again...?

No response. There's no right answer really. :D

I even find that even when I'm starting to doubt something. Really, just when I start turning into my negative nelly again, I just switch it off and accept the invitation or give it a chance. Or go out anyways. I love it! I'm turning into a Yes (wo)Man! Priorities change. I absolutely love it.

How's everyone's New Years Resolutions going? I know most people said they were going to take more time for themselves. It's been over a month and I'm expecting you all to do some pampering! You deserve it! :)

Speaking of, I'm getting in the bubble bath! Gonna soak, get silky smooth and give myself a mani! Wish me luck! No smudging! :D

Tata!
Au revoir!

Angela <3

Go.

Birthday prep is underway. You could love the ensemble I've come up with...

:)

How was everyone's day? I think today was fantastic. I just love seeing all my people. By people, I mean all my clients. All the great people that make me love my job so much. Life is so good. So happy to be bouncing back and enjoying life again.

Lets talk love!

How is it that you can love multiple people? Is monogamy really important to people? I feel like my generation is phasing out of the monogamy. Too many people I know are in "open relationships." What does that even mean? You sleep with more than one person? People tell me that when you are together, you are together. When you are not together, you aren't together. Okay... So no jealousy is involved? I find that hard to believe. What about diseases?! Now my opinion is totally out there.. I'm somewhat of a hypochodriac. (Definitely spelled that wrong.)

I feel like loyalty is dead. I can't be the only one. There's certain things you should or should not do. Where's the line? No line? I'm a free spirit, but gimme a break! There's a line.

Thinking about getting all tatted up. Any suggestions from you bloggers? Or DO NOTS! haha

Tata!
Angela

Heart.

Know that when you leave.

By blood and by mean you walk like a thief.

You're the reason why I'm closed.

I just lost my breath. A gasp of shock but a choke on air.

It takes 5 years to understand exactly what you need in life. By you, I mean me. I think I'll never get over this bitterness. How long does it take for you to be over me? RHETORICAL. Apparently, weeks. I don't want anyone to pity me. This isn't the point of this blog. But.. WHAT THE FUCK.

Everyday I just go through the motions and think to myself, "You don't even think about me."

Very sad, indeed. I think you just may be toxic. You are the suffering in life that I have to endure. I can't undue what I have done. I think the sick to my stomach feeling must be a sign that I have to suffer to get out the toxins. You are seeping through my pores. I can not think of you and be happy. You make me sick. Sick enough to live with this.

Regret?
Not sure.

My heart stopped.

Today can end already. It's one day closer to my birthday. A day when I will be the most selfish and happy for myself. A day that I will not think of you. Or any other person wasting my time.

It's not about you anymore.

Team Jacob.

BOOM!
ANGELA OUT.

(tata!)

It stopped.

Yep, I did it. I posted a(nother) picture revolving around the most insane pop culture phenomenon.

I get it. I'm just waiting...

Amazing what love can do. It can lift you up. Make you feel incredible. It can put you down, sick to your stomach. Love never gets old, though. We endure the roller coaster and just try to grip it for dear life. I'm not the only person that thinks this either. I've had many conversations. Now I hear about the unfaithful parts. Putting families in bad positions and second chances. To stay or flee?

I once saw things very straight. Black and white is just not the case for every person's personal life.There's always 3 stories. Everything in life is interpreted in a different way. You say what he said. He said what he saw. Actions, words. Actions, words.

What is worse? Actions or words?

I can't even choose.

Everyday I keep saying to myself, "It will come. Everything is good." It's been over 6 months. It hasn't come yet. I might be going through a phase, that I will just have to keep chugging through. No one said life is always going to be easy. No one has had an extremely easy life. Everyone's got their thing.

I am not pregnant. Good lord, what are you guys thinking about?!

On that note, now I am going to enjoy a bubbly bath and sing and soak. :)

Tata!
Angela





I thought I was a fool for no one.
Baby, I'm a fool for you.

Big Bang.

It doesn't really matter until the liquor hits.

Today, I am drinking Jack. This tongue has a hard time holding as it is. Now give it some Jack... Houston, we have a problem. Went to a function today. I ran into some old old faces.

Really, really, old faces. I am suddenly EXTREMELY PROUD of myself. I would've loved to be a fly on the wall after I left. No one has much of anything. Not that money really matters... scratch that. It kind of does. These people looked skeeeeeezy. I don't know if that's the right word. I'm going to go with it. I don't think too many people recognized me. But it was fun to see the faces of those that did recognize me. !!! O_O !!! Yeah... that was fun.

I think the people that I saw were seriously reaching for conversation. Which, to be honest was kind of sad. For once, I was a tad dumb founded. What do you talk about when the people surrounding you still are in their 15 year old mindset? RHETORICAL. You can't really say much. Just walk away. HA!

What the heck is wrong with some of you? You have no self-worth? You can't do things without your friends. By the way, your friends aren't doing anything with their lives. Move on. If you still have ALL of your 27 friends from highschool... frankly, I just feel sorry for you.

I think that covers just about everything. Now if my future husband would just grow up about 5 years, we could actually be around eachother. Amazing. I still completely understand why I never dated you. When you are around me, you let your guard down and I love being with you. But then as soon as you realize how much we connect, you have to put that guard right back up. Or maybe you think you're vulnerable? Is it your friends you're worried about? Who are you trying to impress? It doesn't impress me. FYI.

Let it down and be yourself. You're missing out on someone that could make you very, very happy.


TRUTH

tata!
Your Angela

El latido de mi corazón.

Mi amor por ti es incondicional.

No quiero para escuchar mi telefono cuando estas mirando para mi.

I am so over the love cycle. Just drool, already.

I have so much to say but can't find the words today. I will leave it as is then.

Corazon Espinado.

Hasta luego!

<3 Angela

Waterfall.

They were just words. That I have locked. I look at them whenever I am really sad. I look at them whenever I think of you. Lately, it's not too much but I feel like you are thinking of me. Why else would I be thinking of you out of no where.
RHETORICAL.
I am so much a believer in signs.
I can't stop dreaming of you.
Thinking of the first time I saw you.
Thinking about your face and how you looked at me.
I think of how I could feel someone's eyes on me.
I know your curiousity got the best of you.
I know it was you staring at me. Gathering as much information as you could about me.

I know what you are doing. Where you are and I'm wondering if you are thinking of me. I wonder if what you are doing, has a significance to me. Because those words actually meant something. You can pretend to be a senseless man with no feelings to anyone around you. But I know you think and wish for me. I am for you. You are for me. I saw you once. You wanted to know me. You want to know me.

I am not getting married. I don't want to find anyone. I want to be alone and hopefully I will get swept off my feet. I will wait for forever to find someone.

I am dreaming of our paradise.




Life goes on.
It gets so heavy.
The wheel breaks the butterfly.
Every tear, a waterfall.
In the night, the stormy night
She'll close her eyes.
In the night, the stormy night
Away she'd fly.

And dreams of para- para
Paradise.

C'est la vie.

I lived and loved today. I'm normal again. I didn't feel any regret, anger and I especially didn't feel lonely. My appetite is back (dang.) and I didn't feel the anxiety and out of sorts feelings I've had for too long.

I'm back to being happy. I would shout it from the top of a building if I could. I'M HAPPY!

Anyone done any laughing lately? I have been having so many happy memories and funny funny memories that have been attacking me. At work, not so fun to explain why I'm laughing. People must think I'm nuts. Which I'm okay with. :)

Guess who has been indulging? I bought myself an early birthday present. :) I got a new Coach purse. It's beautiful! Cherry red, and gorgeous! I am one happy girl. My Kindle fits perfectly in it.

Been talking to someone that I never expected to have much in common with. Well, that's how it goes doesn't it? RHETORICAL. The time you actually stop looking and start relaxing. Someone comes along. Takes you by surprise. Makes you feel a little bit more sane. It's funny to just "get" someone. You're automatically on the same page. I'm sorry, I just don't want to play games. Don't even bother. I know I'm not crazy to think that. Say it. Just say it and be done with it. Don't play with people's emotions. Don't string people along. That karma isn't good for life. Bad JuJu.

What has everyone been up to? Living and loving life? You better. This is life. Start living it. Smile at the people you don't know. Talk to your neighbor in the grocery line. People love getting to know beautiful people. :D

Tata!
Angela



Make me come alive come on and turn me on.
Touch me. Save my life.
I'm too young to die.
Come on.

Paler is prettier.

Man, I really miss this show. Did anyone catch the last season?! I missed about 3/4 of it. Totally regretting getting rid of HBO. Such a good network.

So! How was everyone's weekend?! I went to Howl at the Moon last night. What a neat place. Too bad I drank a ton. I had fun, but some of it is hazy.

And it starts...

Things are changing. My life isn't going to be forced anymore. I refuse to be uncomfortable in any situation. I plan on getting things straightened out and being exactly what I am. Which is the goal in life, right? Being alone is good for the soul. I don't even want to meet anyone. I don't want to be around anyone that is just going to waste my time.

Been having my unsettled feeling. More than likely, this is just me being paranoid. I need just pure relaxation. I spent allllll Sunday just relaxing. I can't tell you how amazing it was. I need to feel alone and settled. No fear, no judgment. That's how you live your life.

Taking a holistic approach for my new found relaxing life. Getting in touch with inner Ayurvedic techniques. My yoga is starting up again. I'm going to be a little bit different with my style. Going to make my phone a 4th or 5th priority. Call me if you need me.

Side note, Anyone believe in exposure therapy? Random, I know.

So, now I'm going to read for a couple hours and enjoy my quiet quiet room. :)

Feels good.

Tata!
Angela

Birthday plans.

It's Girls Night Saturday, tomorrow!! :)

Going into the Chi tomorrow! Gettin' my groove on at Howl at the Moon! :) Can't wait to be with some fun, new people! Well, not really new. But new to go to the city with! Plus, it'll give me some fun birthday ideas. Cha-ching! :D

Speaking of birthday! My birthday is coming up! What are you getting me? ;) I'm thinking a cheeeeese party is in the cards. Cheese, wine, deli meats. The works! How fun! And Parisian! <3 it!

Je me sens aimé.

I decided to for sure make my Valentines this year. The glitter herpes are going to infect everyone this year! Can't wait to hopefully see the reflection pictures on Facebook! Hey! That's a great idea! Post your glitter herpes!! :D! I don't know if I want that rep. tho. hmm... thoughts...

Today was GOD AWFUL! I had so many nightmares last night and I'm starting to think I need to keep a positive mind before I go to bed. So I'll switch back to watching Pink Panther with Steve Martin, instead of reading. The books I'm reading are pretty violent so it could be the source.

I had dreams about the past as well. It really got to me to where I considered calling off of work to take a mental health day. Instead I got out of bed and put myself together as best as I could. I had a hard time keeping it together. Everyone was asking me about my love life today, as well. Had to be the curse of Friday the 13th. Just a rough, rough day. I pulled it together last minute and ended my day pretty fabulously. Now here I am, drinking my Kahlua and listening to my Parisian music and about to take a bubble bath. Life is good. (And almost the 14th)

I kept telling myself, in the back of my mind though, "You need to be happy. You can't be miserable another day. Think of all the things you would be dealing with if things hadn't changed. You made the right choice. Let him go." I think it helped. It got me to thinking that the more bitter I am, the more I am going to live in that bad, bad funk.

So here I go! Happy. :)

Au revoir!
(tata!)
Angela <3

Back in (almost) black.

Surprised? I bet not. I changed again. 2x. Which is which? I am darker.

Duuhhh.

So today it started to snow! YEEE!!! :) Now I can get my snowboarding on the road. I miss being on a board. TRUTH. I had such a good summer season with all the wakeboarding I honestly can't wait to hit the snow this year. Anyone doing any winter sports? Great way to pass some time. That's for sure!

I can't get enough of my Kindle I got this year. Probably the best Xmas gift I've ever gotten. The Fire is incredible. I read my first book in about a week. Downloaded about 5 others, some free, some not free. lol I'm reading The Hunger Games trilogy. It's pretty incredible. I really hope the movie does it some justice. It's a pretty brutal concept actually, but very worth it! :D

Anyone have any fun plans this weekend? I'm headed to the city. Hopefully I'll meet some really great people. I'll be with some really great people, so that's all that really matters. :D

Well, time to read again. :) Seriously can't get enough of this book.

Tata!

Angela

Sweet Cherry Pie.

This year for the New Year, I decided that I was going to do everything I said I would do. So instead of just talking, I'm going to walk that talk. So my big thing last year that I talked about was getting my M license.

I'm being fully serious.

I might not get a bike for awhile, in a year or who knows, maybe I'll never get one. But I want that license. With or without that license, I want to go to Sturgis this year. A bike or no bike... I'm planning on going.

I miss my biker crowd. I didn't get any biking in this last year. I'm overdue. Time to feel the wind in my hair. :)

Feeling much much better today. Feeling strong about that decision. Thinking about the bad. And the reason why everything has happened. Moving on is always a good decision when you were miserable. The back up and the memories came flooding back. At first the good ones, then the bad ones. I hope things do stay like this. I don't want to get sucked back in. All we need is another year of that. haha!

My cushion has disappeared. Which, hey! I'm feelin' pretty damn good about that. Some people just can't walk their talk. Which, he probably shouldn't. So that makes me feel a little better. It's good to be alone with no bells ringing. Chingle chingle chingle every 10 seconds gets a little... no idea... Annoying.

Welcome to the outside world, Angela.

Anyways, if that cushion were to actually walk that talk... I think that would be the wrong timing. Timing is everything.

If it's meant to be... it will be. Touche

How's everyone's resolutions going? I'm sure fantastically! :D Don't forget to smile.. especially tomorrow! It's hump day! No? Winedown Wednesday? YES!!! One bottle, Two bottle, Three bottle Fleur! hahaha!


tata!

Angela

Shouldn't have.

I'm going to admit it. I knew it was a bad decision. Now I can't stop wondering and wondering and wondering. It was a huge mistake. Shouldn't have ever done it.

How was your day?

My current thoughts on my hair are: Wow, way to prove yourself wrong... again. Officially, my hair has turned a muddy green. Great job huh? lol

I bleached it, then bleached it again. Duh, oh Angela. Why did you think the darkest color depositing conditioner you own would be a good idea? So yes, my sandy blonde hair is looking a tad... green. Chlorine green. Not pretty emerald green. Oh well. I'll just color it tomorrow. :)

Did some shopping today. I'm so excited. Valentine's Day stuff is out! :D My other favorite holiday. I think I officially decided that the hand-made valentines are going out this year. Glitter and all. YYYEEEEE!!!

I'm also giving out gifts this year to all my friends/family/loved ones. Nothing new. But also might be doing a ton of handy- work on that. Yikes, got a lot more than I thought I had to do. Better get a move on that. Organizing 101.

So any Valentine's day plans? I honestly think I'll just work and go home and watch a sappy movie with Rocco. He's my new boyfran. :D

So... now I think I'll go to bed. Done for today. Hoping the cough will be gone by tomorrow. :/

Tata!
Angela

The Ark is the problem.

My my my, how the days are just FLYING by. Today was a love hate day. Loved the love part of it. Then hated it. (Also, I'm sick, still.) I'm getting bitter by the day. And I don't know if it's because I feel like I am forgotten or if I'm just feeling lonely. I think its a number of things but today was very quiet. Normally, I'de love this. Today way just a lot of sitting around. It was great but then I was getting bored.

Started thinking about the simpler sides of life. Like being up North in the woods. People can relax up there. Enjoy their surroundings and just not worry about who will call or text them. What a life it must be. A completely different exposure to the world. I think I would love it. Having a more relaxed and outdoors atmosphere. Something to think about...

Were nearly 1/3 through January. Insane that my birthday is just around the corner. I'm dabbling in a few different themes for my birthday. Either Hawaiian themed, fiesta themed or my classic pink, red and roses theme. It'll probably be the last one. lol

Anyone happy about this weather? I'm starting to get genuinely nervous about it. If it isn't here now, what does this mean? It's a scary thought.

Oh well, things can be worse. AMI right?

Time to bathe, wish me luck! I'm hoping it's going to open up some of my congested chest! :$

Tata!

Angela

Dancing in clouds.

Tonight, I drank. And then had another one. It's been... a while? Since I had one. It was deserving. I've been nursing a cold or whatever this hell is. EIther way, I'll rock this raspy voice. It sucks, but I'll rock it.

I"m drowsy. I don't have much to say lately. I had a fun dinner with my hunnies tonight. Meaning the folks. We laughed pretty hard. At my mom. hahahaha!

Work is slow, but steady. Which to be honest, I plan on taking a day to relax maybe next week. :) Everyone is deserving of a day off. Ya mean?

Been dancing a ton lately. Got my belly dancing in. A little bit of the more modern stuff as well. A long time friend and me are going to be taking a pole dancing class soon. Exciting right? Can't wait to get some guns. Not that I don't have them already. :) haha!

I'm tired. And tipsy. So I go now.

Tata!

Angela

Drunk on love.

I feel like I'm a hopeless romantic.
I can't help fallin' in love.
I want it.
I crave it.
I just can't get enough.
Take me away.
Nothing can sober me up.

I feel my Nonna today. I keep seeing things, but nothing is there. I hear something fall, very randomly. Yet, nothings in the floor. I know she's here. I just can't tell if she's trying to tell me something or just wants me to say "hi." So I went with "Hi, Nonna!" We'll see what happens.

Been reading a ton lately. It's amazing what a good book will do for ya. Got lost in "Hunger Games." The last week or two I spent hours reading in the dark. Felt amazing to actually be caught up in someone else's life. I love being able to let go of my worries and get some fun in, in my life.

My thoughts are getting more relaxed. My appetite is finally back.
I think it's passing.

Therefore, not much to write about.

One thing, I'm bleaching tomorrow. I have a good hour before my first comes in tomorrow. Bust out the 40 volume. I mean serious blonde business. We'll see how that goes. :D

Tata!

Angela

Look like me?

I think it does. But I'de need some airbrushing don't you think?

Things hit the fuckin' fan today. I have never been so excited to get home in my life. I thought about my family and how know matter what happens, they'll be on my side. We're all an angry bunch, truely.

Work was shit. All the drama is getting really really old. I come home and literally find SHIT in my bed. I love these days. At least someone can make me smile, though. :D

Who wants to make my hair grow faster? Because I'm getting pretty sick of this little bob. Everyone today told me how long it looks. Also, Joe. Yes that Joe Aunt Vicki, told me my hair looks to perfect he thought it was a wig. I was like daaaaaaaang! That's high compliments! Or is it? IT IS!

We just got in all this new color for Aveda. Oy ve. Can't wait to use it actually. We got blue, greeeen, violet, orange. All the high pigments. OOOOOOOOooo baby. Can't wait to get a raccoon tail going. Don't worry, it'll just be a strip. Not the whole head lol.

Dang, I had a lot to say. About nothing. Ha!! Must go now. Adios!

Tata!
Angela

Blonde's on the brain.

New year. New outlook. New relationships. New fun. New life.

What is the most refreshing part? It started with a BANG! How was everyones new year? Great, I hope!

Feeling pretty good lately. A lot of people have been asking me if I've lost weight. That's something to be excited about! Ami right?! Truth is, I don't really know. I haven't weighed myself in a long long time. I feel good, and my clothes fit different so that's a good sign.

New year, new you. So what is everyone going to do this year. Resolutions?

I have a few things I want to change. Mostly taking time for me. I decided to take a vacation every quarter. And this includes weekend trips and long trips. I also want to run 4 races this year. If I can, one a quarter. I'm not going to say which races I'm going to do but I would like to do at least one 8k. :) Lots of fun changes.

The main change for me, will be what I decide to look like. I plan on taking it down some. I don't want to be so unhappy with the way I look. In the last year, I changed so much. My skin tone is different, my hair is changing. I am a different person. I should take it back... I'm not unhappy with the way I look. I just felt like I was in a rut this year because of all the changes. I didn't really know how to deal with them. So now, I'll make some changes and decide what's best.





To the nitty gritty. Blonde is on the brain.

There's something way comforting about this show. When I think about them and all the funny things that happen, all the luxury and vacations these girls take... They just crack me up. They actually seem more normal then the rest of the housewives. And that's pretty ridiculous because all of them do not live a normal life. Oh, well. :)

So I can't decide what to do. I'm torn. I want to really try to do the fun and fiesty platinum blonde thing but I just got this hair long. But then again, the condition is pretty good, so I wouldn't necessarily lose a lot of length. Sigh... grrr...

It'll be a rough night. lol

So, tell me something good!

Tata!

Angela