Dun Dun Dun...

You done it NOW!

Been feeding my food addiction. Oh that appetite. Never happy when it takes control again. Oh well.

So! Guess what starts up after the new year?! Burlesque classes!! :D!! Here's the kicker. I work Saturdays. That's out. I work Tuesday and Thursday nights. So.. the beginner classes. Bummer. No place for me to go. What I'm thinking I might do is switch my schedule a bit... seems like a great way to make some changes. Get away from some things. Do a little switch-eroooo!

How absolutely gorgeous!

New Years resolutions anyone? Last year, I made the resolution to take a vacation every quarter. Even if it's just a weekend away. I failed. Miserably. I made it to one vacation. It was a week long. That counts for maybe 1 1/2. Right?

So this year, I'm going to make more time for myself. I always put off that pedicure. I never get to work out. I never get to make my lunches. Never get to do that 3 mile run I was looking forward to. So! Maybe, just maybe, it might be a little easier to accomplish this year. :)

CHEERS!








and Tata!
<3 Angela P.S. Be Fabulous, Darlin'!

Angel *

So. What's too fast?
Having sex on the first date?
Going 60 in a 30?
Getting married after 6 months?

Really, who is to judge, ami right?

It all opinion anyways.

I had a life changing experience. And I am happy about that. :) It is definitely going to take some time to getting used to. NO, I'm not pregnant. And NO, I'm not engaged or married.
But, love is... wonderful. Inspiring. Reassuring.
Who knows what the word is. You can't even really define it.

But I feel... elated. Like I have a best friend. Someone who I can sit in complete silence with and still smile and giggle to myself.
Hey, don't be hatin'.

Something big is coming. I can feel it. I'm trying so hard to find it and creating all this build up. Then, I'm not so much let down, but still waiting for it. Something big is brewing!

So, I go to bed now. I'll dream of all the amazing things it could be. :D


Chains of love got a hold on me.

Tata!
<3 Angela

Extreme Extremes.

Ah... I have found the source of life problems. I have found that extremes will kill your goals.

Don't force things. Don't think that cutting something out completely will solve your problems. Don't eat just meat. Don't not eat sugar. Live in the middle. Get your fix but don't be a hog. Life is all about balance, apparently.

If none of you have known, I sometimes have some anxiety. I get in my head and start to think and think and think. I put myself in anxiety filled situations. So when I know that the plans I made are coming up soon, I have already thought about it and what will happen and what to expect. Then comes my heart. THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP. I feel like completely ditching whatever plan I had and just doing anything but that plan. Anything to get me to relax again.


It is quite an inconvenience, but maybe it's a sign or a gift. My everyday life is so planned. I'm all time and scheduled. Time. What an incredible thing. Maybe the spontaneity of life is missing from mine. Everything happens for a reason, right? Even if I have to suffer, maybe I need to lose control to see the beauty of the situation. It shouldn't be feared. Fear after all, is just something in your head. You create it.

An extreme. Why worry. Don't fear. Live in the now. Because tomorrow is the future. Yesterday was the past. Stay here. Be balanced

Tata!
Angela



I'm waking up, I feel it in my bones.
Enough to make my system blow.

Get it girl.

Do you really think that people can read minds?

Maybe people think that you can read theirs.

Yeah, knock me down.



There's a lot of energy not being burned here. A lot of anger is bottling and I've had it just about up to here.

There's nothing more annoying than being judged for everything that comes out of your mouth.



By the way, grow up.

Are you ever around someone and feel that they know everything. You can't tell them anything and you really don't want to even speak because you know they will never understand your opinion? How do you approach this situation? Because right now, I'm starting to get a headache. So I just walk away.

So, I don't need this. No one does. Get you shit in order. Be a decent human being and keep your cool.


But if your shit is not together
It'll never be you and me, plant the seed
Open up and let it be

Hit it on the head.

Now to decide what next.



Tata
<3 Angela We've had our fill, we've had enough, we've had it up here
Are we all we are
Are we all we are

Drop.

They always said that there would be a person that comes into my life and will change my mind. I get it now.


The only thing I can't help but do is wonder. Everything is so vague and it's annoying. I sometimes think I know exactly what I think. But then I feel as if I know nothing. I get so mad at myself for falling so fast and hard. I put all my eggs in one basket. I don't even know how it happened.

I have this love hate relationship with myself. I want to be real and put myself in a good place. Being honest and a decent person. Now here I am. Wishing I hadn't because frankly, I have no idea how he feels about me.


I so miss my cat. I never thought I would say that but I feel that she's still here and when I look for her, I can't find her. It's upsetting.

I recently went and got extensions. The extensions only last a wopping 4 days. Something that was supposed to last up to 3 months only stayed in for 4 days. Holy cow. I hated looking at myself in a mirror. When you really don't have a clue who you are, don't think a set of hair will make you feel better. Well hey, it's a lesson I had to learn the hard way, I guess. Hair doesn't make a woman. It brought me down.


I have this theory. When I have my short hair, I feel confident, pretty and... "out of their league?" I don't know how else to describe it. With longer hair, I feel like I attract the "bro's" and the boys. The boys that have no clue what they're getting themselves into. They can't keep up and they want to play games. Ew. I also feel like the boys that say they want to see me with long hair are the guys that will never last. Do you know just how amazing us women can be?

I'm starting to think it's a power- struggle type thing. This bad- ass chick has short as hell hair. She really doesn't care what anyone thinks about her, she has a self- esteem and can hold her own. Can't win with her... might as well pray on the weak ones then.

Just a theory I'm starting to develop. It also is a generation thing I think as well. Cultural? Hm... more work to be done!

I go now. Tata!

Angela

Dark Clouds

Nothing is what it cracks up to be.

Wanna know what I think? I'm starting to think love is admiration. The more I get to know people, friends, a lover, an acquaintance etc. I just can't help but feel like people are scared. I can't say I'm not. I feel more scared than ever to fall in love. I don't want to be vulnerable. I don't want to say it first.

Everything is greener on the other side.


Is there something wrong with not knowing exactly how to feel or how to act? I know. It makes no sense.



I've been chasing the sun for too long and I couldn't wait for the sun to set.
Now the darkness is more and more everyday.
I feel claustrophobic in my own head...
What was to be my solution is now my biggest and darkest problem.

Gimme dat.

Aaaaand snap.

So many thoughts. Where to begin.

New love is always so confusing. You may think you are giving you're whole self. But are you really? I'm not into games. I don't want to deal with someone who isn't being up-front and honest. Do we hold back because we don't want to be disappointed? It's possible. Should we really wear our heart on our sleeve?


It's not too wise with how people are now adays. In my opinion, of course.

That's all for now.

So.. Hold up!

EEEEEE!!!!! What is up! Love love love love loooooove. Love is in the air.

>>---> <3 STRUCK.



I am so loving life right now! :D How are you? Hopefully loving life! :)

My butterflies are back. And in full force. They might be taking full control if I'm not careful. I can't wait to see if he's everything I'm expecting. I hope I'm pleasantly surprised. :D

I have nothing to add!!! I have so much excitement in my heart right now. I can't hardly breath. I'm ready to pop at any minute. Just like a balloon. My voice is squeely and I'm ready to burst into laughter and screams at any moment. Hands up! Touch the sky!


I'm higher than a motha... :D

Tata!

<3 Angela

OKay.

Please pay attention. Survival of the fittest.

Well, well, well. Life is just peachy keeeeen. I'm thinking about changing my profession. Going into motivational speaking. Oh, wait. I lied. It's not that. Maybe I should just PRRREEEAACH. That's what blogging is all about right? RIGHT?!

I did it again. I cut off the hair. Lets just address the white elephant in the room. HA! Can you blame a sista? It's hot up in these streets. I'm not exaggerating. It's really really hot out here. I needed to get rid of some bad thoughts. Needed to start fresh. Some times you need to do that. It's good for the soul to start a new era.

I went on a date! :) Well, I don't know if you would consider it a "blind date" but it was "online inspired." :D I had a lot of fun. We talked for hours and definitely have a lot in common. Even if we don't end up together, I could definitely see him in my life for a long time. They definitely can pick em. Good thing.

I have officially started to tan this summer! Usually, I'm so white and pale I just burn and burn. That SPF 15 is really doin' my body good. I got a little crispy I want to say Memorial Day weekend, but other than that, not at all anymore.

Everyone enjoying their summer thus far? It's almost mid-june. Where does time go? Out the window, apparently.

I hadn't blogged in a hot minute, but I don't have much to say anymore. I guess things could be better, could be worse. But I try not to dwell on the bad. Or even worry for that matter. I worry about me. Forget just about everyone else. Making myself happy was probably my best life decision, yet. Happiness is something you have to work for. Which, is one of the hardest things to accomplish sometimes. Life is always going to challenge you. They should put that in the dictionary. Haha!

I go now. Sleepy time. :D

TaTa!
Angela





You don't talk. You don't say nothin'.

Fat lip.

Don't count on me. Cause I'm not listenin'.

Don't wanna waste my time. Wasting on you. How pathetic to waste time on one person. They're not that special. Who is worth your time? Your real friends and family.

Vacation is in order! Too bad its WEEKS away. Right?

Ugh. Why does everything have to be with TIME?! Time ruins and MAKES everything. Why is time so important.

I guess it really depends on the day and person to go on a rant like this.

I just cracked my mouse. Killing a spider. Unbelievable. Good thing it's just a little shatter. :)

So as much as I love to be low- maintenance and have an un-glamourous day here and there. Can't help but look in the mirror on those days and yelp a tad at the fact that I am not a beautiful as I can be. I so love my glamourous looks and sharp dressed self. Love my eye liner and contour. MmMmmMmm.. good stuff. I guess beauty is always in the eye of the beholder. :) right? I so thought I would be able to pull off this whole low maintenance, hippie look. No way. I guess I have to go back to the old me. With that dark hair and sweeping eye liner. :D good stuff!

On that note! Bath time! yay!! Bubbles are in order! :)

Tata!

Angela

Demon.

Voices can make someone's day. One ruined mine today. I'm pretty sure my heart literally STOPPED for at least 4 seconds. Choking, a gasp for air. Yep, that happened. What? It happens, right?

How stunning is this chick? I think I have a girl crush. She is probably one of the coolest people I've ever seen. Every one of her interviews I had to wonder, holy cow, I think she's like a long lost sister of mine. We seem a lot alike. Who knows though, maybe she's the complete opposite. She is an actress after all.

I just love any actress that doesn't want to fit any kind of mold. They like who they are and how they look. I wish most girls/women were like that. We always put ourselves down. Such a shame. We need to lift each other up! Don't you think?

Whoa. I did a shot and I can feel the relaxation running through me. Yay! Happiness joins!

Hm... I thought I had more to blog about. But! Guess not. Oh well, it's best I crash anyways! :)

Tata!

Angela

Bien Bien.

What a day it has been. I have seen so much happiness in my weekends. I can hardly take the heartbreak anymore. Only a flicker of my heart makes me realize it was still there. I can't believe how much you can think about something. Over and over in your head. It will drive you nuts.

The worst part is the one after. Not the ex.

Ready.

My new thing is finding hobbies. If you stay out of your head, you won't worry, stress or get depressed. Who would have thunk it. Keeping busy will keep your mind busy. My current goals are getting my body back. I so much just put me on the back-burner for so long. You tend to lose track of whats important. But hey! Now you know! Live and learn right! Now I'll be using exercise as therapy.

It's so under-used, exercise I mean. Total shame.

Who's excited about Breaking Bad? I can't believe it's back soon! I'm freakin' out! I can't express the obsession I have with this show. What is the best part? hm... Aaron. I think thats my answer? If you don't watch, you are missing out in a big way. The first episode grabs you. If you decide to watch the controversial yet captivating story of a chemistry teacher with lung cancer, turn meth cook becomes a total bad ass and takes out many people to get to the top including the main honcho, you won't be disappointed.

I just gave away a lot of the plot. Sorry. Well, not really. It's an incredible show with an amazing cast.

Well, I think I'll google some things, then probably bathe. I wore jean shorts today with unshaved legs. I feel very... rebellious yet dirty.

OH! I rollerbladed for an hour today! Google how good rollerblading is for you. It might persuade you to do some skating this summer! :)

Tata!

Angela

Do it, or what?

Well hello, bloggers!

Long time no chat! Way over-due if I do say so myself.

Many new things have come my way.

I've had an emotional breakdown, a ton of changes, travelled, committed to a double date! I am quite the go-getter! ? Maybe... sorta.

Anywho! I have become quite a superstitious person (again) lately. I have so very much been seeing many signs/omens if you believe in any of that. I definitely do. I recently started reading into different stones and their symbology or healing powers. Very bazaar to think that a stone can calm you. But really, it may be a placebo, or maybe its not.


Other things, have you ever looked into your dreams? For the longest time, I was having tornado dreams. I was driving next to a tornado, trying to out run it on foot or car. Very.. terrifying. Not fun to wake up after running and stressing in your sleep.

I have gone back to my roots of what I really love. I love movies, books, good drinks and food. I love this and that. It has brought me back to what's important in my life. Maybe the combination of going on a vacation helped a little too. I am important. A lack of confidence has really hurt me the last few months. Well, it's been... 6? months now. So hey. About fricken time. Everyone has their phases. *Shrugs*

I was liking this whole new blogger thing. But now I'm realizing I can't separate my thoughts. It's not allowing me to space. BOGUS. Boycott.

I should go bathe anyhow. Maybe that's my sign to sign out. So I will!

Tata!

Angela

P.S. Fixed it!! YEAH! BOOYAH!

Push and Pull.

How amazing. Love can make all the difference in the world.

I had an awful day the other day. I was so fed up with everyone's attitude. Everyone was being so negative and I was worn out. I got annoyed and pissed off. I wanted to run to my car and go for a drive for hours. Just get away from everyone and their comments. I started to pour a cocktail. I was making a mixed drink. So I poured my whiskey first. I went to the 2 liter and WHIPPED it open, of course I was angry. The pop exploded all over my face and chest. I couldn't even react I just let it spray all over me.

I decided that was my sign. I started laughing hysterically at myself and how angry I was. Then this amazingly funny thing happened to me. No one saw it and I so badly wish someone did. I laughed the whole time while I cleaned up the soda on the floor. When I took my shower, I so smiled and still chuckled at how rediculously angry I was. It was so flipped and just incredible.

I need more reminders like that. Reminders to stay calm. Not to get too high strung. Life goes on. Don't lose your patience! :D

Tata!

Angela <3

Sporadic.

Well, well, well... Things are really starting to shape up. For the good, Claro! I think when you start getting a backbone again, things really start to play out the way you'd like. Standing up for yourself really does have some benefits! Who would've thunk it!

Each day I try to set a mini goal. For the most part, those goals are being met! :D Lots to smile about.

Easter was fantastic! I went to my first Techno concert on Saturday! It was in the City and it was QUITE an interesting/ fun time. I couldn't hear anything for about 2 days, I made a pie Sunday morning and was crocked until my next (brunch) drink. Fantastic weekend! That is what you would call SUCCESS! I've also been late to work everyday so far and slept probably 24 hours over the last 3 days. So... recovering can be rough sometimes. ;)



Now. Now. Now. What have we been talking about lately? Not a clue. Don't you ever get the feeling there's a time and place for everything in life? I do. Especially as of late. I can't help but think I need/needed time for all this reflection! I don't know if you have noticed, but my blogs are becoming more sporadic. It must mean that it's time to start living again. ;) Or! Rather! I have been living!

Getting to the root of who you are is a hard lesson to learn. There's a core, a foundation, all your beliefs and all of your meaning. Your roots are all you need. WELL, you need the rest but your guts and your roots are the most important. You can lose yourself completely but your roots will always bring you back. I thought I was something I wasn't.

Got in touch with someone from my past. Hard lesson. I realized just what I was getting myself into, letting this person back into my life. Your past can shape your roots. Let it be a memory of why you are the way you are.

Everyone that is from your past, deserves to be there. Touche.

Tata!

Angela <3

Glad.

Sigh of HUGE relief. I've come to realize everything in life doesn't have to be a fight.
One of life's greatest lessons:

When you don't know what to say first, Don't say anything.

Holy crap. When you get stuck in your head, you're never able to let something go. So when I'm ready to jump out and get blunt, I stop and wait. I'll let you take care of everything.

This makes no sense to you. But that's okay. It's not supposed to make sense. I have this theory. All things can be avoided, so long as you use honey and you have patience.

It's all honey. Honey. Honey.


How's love? I had to tell myself recently that I have an EX for a reason. Not that anything was going to happen. But when the sudden stomach drop happens, you have to say something to yourself.

Not all people believe in my beliefs. I understand that, I really do. But if you at one point during your relationship you think to yourself, "This is NOT what I signed up for," you need to recognize that before getting into this relationship with your EX. Not everything is going to be different. Especially if it's 3-6 months down the road. Years, fine. I'll accept that people can change.

Any plans for Easter? I for one, can't express how excited I am for Easter. I'm a playboy girl. Any excuse to wear my ears is FINE BY ME. :D

Well, busy weekend ahead of me. Better hit that NEW BED. Get some AMAZING sleep. :) aahhhh...

Tata!

Angela <3

State the Obvious.

Life is too short. Don't waste your time on people that waste your time. Pretty simple, ami right? Of course I am! Why would you put yourself through hell. And back. It's not a question. Just stating the obvious. Really, I can't be the only one who does this face ---> o_O

I am not alone. And I am not aloud to waste more time on people that don't matter. People get so caught up in themselves. Who they're trying to be and who they're trying to impress. Honestly, I hate fakers. Fake your life and everything that comes out of your life is bullshit. The worst thing you can do is act in life. People smell bull shit from very very far away. I smell *sniff sniff* an act.

What happened to the positive people? Is anyone honestly giving the outsider a chance? No. Probably not. They're too stuck on their friends and who will judge them. Don't judge, don't be judged. No one can do that. Only God Can Judge Me. Stick to that!

Who do you live for? Think about that every time you get consumed in someone's gossip. Who cares. Stay out of it.


So. Sticking to the get in touch with nature thing everyday. Usually, I try to sit outside on my deck for 20-30 minutes every morning. Such a relaxing thing hearing the birds and watching the sun move. Incredible thing seeing the world change minute by minute. It's such an amazing thing to really appreciate the world we live in. I know that's not the scientific thing. But really, it's as if the sun moves, being here.

Anyone star gazed lately? You should. You're missing out. I can't believe how bright the stars and moon have been! It's been so clear! Get outside and check out how amazing the world really is! You'd be surprised how much you really love it. Even people like me, (with awful allergies/sinus') can really appreciate all this beauty.

Well! TTFN!

Tata!
Angela

Pay yourself.

Say it ain't so.
Your drug is a heart-breaker.
Say it ain't so.
My love is a life-taker.

Hey! Happy Hunger Games! Life is good. Kinda. Well, the Hunger Games makes life happier.

When do we find comfort as human beings? Is comfort and happiness found in other people? Say, a lover? I don't have the slightest clue.

I find some comfort in other people's lives. Found in movies. Laughter with other people. Is anything better than a genuine connection? With other people I mean. It's like fireworks. Incredible feeling, actually.

Waiting to feel normal. Again.

I find comfort in what I do, as well. I connect with people and get involved with working to make someone feel great about themselves. Is that considered selfish or selfless? Tamayta. Tahmahtoe.

Going to a concert soon! Can you say excited?! It's my first! I'm a virgin! It's a techno concert! Is that considered a concert? Or more of a dance contest? We'll see. :D

My savings account is growing! Of course I am buying things, yet, still able to save. Hooray for me! I'm still thinking my first house will be a lakehouse. That way I can rent it out and really make some dough. Also, isn't that considered a business? RHETORICAL. I think it is. :)

Any lakes I should check out? I think Pine Lake has some potential and then I wanna see Paw Paw. Anyone? Anyone have suggestions? I need to be able to check it out within 3-4 hours. Any more (Minocqua) is too far. Thanks!!


Tata!
Angela


I can't confront you, I never could do...
That which might hurt you, so try and be cool
when I say, "This way is a waterslide away from me that takes me further every day,"
hey, so be cool.

Movin' on.

Anyone feel like rebelling? Happens to me a lot. Dealing with Daily Demons, claro. Nothing new, obviously. Anyone have any constant battles? Something that is a constant? I think most of us have some sort of habit, ism, problem. Right?

I decided I'm going to talk about all the BULL SHIT and crazy things I hear on a daily basis. A frequent topic is always marriage. Most of the people I'm surrounded by are married. Sigh...

Is anyone happy? I hear about all these "unknown" people that are stuck in their marriage. They don't want to break up the family. They don't want to move out of their house yet. That means that they'll lose dadadadadadaddadadaaaa...So! In the mean time, they're going to go out and hang out with their lover in town. Huh... that's funny. I'm pretty sure your family is going to be broken up soon if you're doing that. On that subject, Is a mind-fuck worse than a real fuck? Everyone says that it's worse. But really, disease can be a major factor in that. How do we feel about this?

Regardless, I think technology is a huge issue in each relationship. They're are MAJOR red flags. Your phone is one of them. If you're territorial over your phone, what does that say? RED FLAG. Also, if you are going out of your way to talk to someone... RED FLAG.

Inhale...

I hate cell phones. They're full of secrets. I personally can't wait to be in my next relationship for the factor of seeing how they handle their phone. I'm so flippin' picky. This will be funny. I have this thing where, if I'm out to dinner, out with friends, out on a date.. I never take my phone out first if I can help it. If you grab you phone before I do, we have a problem. I really don't care what's on your phone. Don't show me.. unless I say, "Google it!" Then Go! Google away.

I don't care about your phone. I don't want to think of all the people you're possibly texting/ talking to. You're just digging a deeper hole. So take note MEN! Don't grab your phone. Unless you have some emergency, or need to check to see who's calling to silence it. I don't like anyone without common courtesy! Helloooo...

Tata!

Angela

Goal.

I consider myself a goal maker. I think life is all about goals. I decided to take some drastic measures this year. It was a year for change. A change in myself mentally and physically.

I never wanna be where I was. I never want to be so unhappy with where I am that I decide to put myself last.

Because of my roller coaster I couldn't really look at food as pleasure anymore. I don't see food as this amazing part of my life. I was such a foodie that I didn't look at food as nutrition. It was a guilty pleasure. I had no plan. I ate whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted. Not to make excuses but when you have a family that is constantly eating and eating meat at that, it is very hard to keep your cool. Being a vegetarian put a huge strain in my diet. I started eating junk food, and more and more processed foods. I was a vegetarian's worst nightmare.

I can't even wrap my head around the way i was. I must have been in a very blissful place. So blissful to completely forget about being healthy. Everyone can get off track every now and then. I don't blame myself. It's a lesson that needs to be learned. I'm just happy things really clicked lately.

So anyways! Switching gears...

Goals! My goals this year are to get back to my healthy self. I don't have a size in mind. Nor a goal weight. I actually HATE getting on scales. I don't think I'll ever be happy with numbers. I can weigh little to nothing but I still want the tone up and muscle. I want to be happy with what I see. I want to be happy with my performance. Get your mind out of the gutter. Any goals for you?

I had more to add. But I lost it. Got lost in those push ups. OH! Happy time change!! YAYY!! summer!! :D

Tata!
Angela <3

Hey!

It's better off this way.
I'm not okay.
Take a good hard look.


See, I'm so indecisive. But when I commit to something, I really, really, whole heartedly commit. I'm committed.

I'm getting a tattoo.


Surprised? I have the best reason in the world for a tattoo. I'm hoping this will just turn into a snowball effect. Life is too short. I am waaayyy too artsy to not show my colors. Pun intended. That's not my reasoning, though. I love them and it's for family. So you can't say thats not legit!

How's everyone feel about tattoos? I have had such a back and forth opinion about them. Now I'm really starting to love them. We all know that I have multiple personalities... Not the end of my thought. But everyone I want to be- can have tattoos. Even the real me.


It's a win- win situation. I need to stop wondering what others will think of me. I need to worry about me. I love art, I love my family. If I can cut hair all day and see it and think of all the happiness my family brings... I'll be one happy girl.

That's what life is all about, right? Family, the people you love, and happiness.

They love you at your best and at your absolute worst.

Got beef?! I don't care. I'm a vegetarian. :P SUCK ON THAT!

Tata!
Angela <3



P.S. I couldn't care less. Do your thang. It won't ever work out.

Miami.

Yep, I'm now thinking Miami. Can you blame a chick? Latinos, A beach, sunshine, amazing food. Sounds like an ace to me!

I have to say, I really love food. But I am pickier. If you include my vegetarianism as "picky" then TACK that in there as well. I love to try new food. I feel like the world is so colorful and bright. Food is such an amazing example of the region your visiting. It will make your trip full of life! I might be the only one who looks forward to what I'm going to eat on vacation... actually, I know that I'm not!

I have studied a lot of food. My mom's italian, my brother a chef, I watch a lot of food of tv, i google a lot. By no means am I a culinary expert but I will say, you do get a feeling of history in each dish you try. What really makes it, is seeing who's making it in the cocina! Nothing better than seeing an abuelita rolling or stirring!

Ahhh... food.

America's Beauty Show was this weekend! Talk about a fun atmosphere! I can't even begin to explain to you what kind of things you see. You just don't see whacky hair. Everything is whacky at this place. It's fun to see people checking you out. But then again you're checking them out. Over- all it's a pretty "hater free" place. Everyone may be looking at you, but they're getting ready to steal something from you if they're really staring.

Got myself some great! new brushes! Can't wait to try em out tomorrow morning! :D It has a sweet case as well. Which is fantastic for travel! Yayyy!!! Travelling!! :)

Well, life is just going. One day at a time. Sometimes I'm lonely. Sometimes I just don't care. It's always a different thing, all. the. time.

That's how life goes. As long as I'm able to sleep at night, I'm okay with that. That's how the cookie crumbles.

Tata!
Angela

And Scene.

Be obscene. Be obscene.

What is sexy? For some, it's the obvious. It's body parts, it's skin, it's anything flashy and nude.

I'm sort of the opposite. I think less is more. Could be my age, but I get a kick out of seeing the chicks with short shorts and low- cut, tore up shirt. Bleach blonde and tanned to orange.

I couldn't be more opposite. Don't get me wrong, I love some skin on occasion. But i find so much pleasure in a form fitting dress. Or a full coverage outfit with a little neck showing. What's not sexy about leaving the mind for imagination? RHETORICAL.

Could just be me. I'm just over all these people and their fads. Make your own style. Don't follow. Isn't that what life is all about? Being your own person, and pulling off whatever look you want?! Take chances, don't let anyone tell you what you should look like. I love originality! Surprise me! Surprise the world! We love people with guts and glory! :D

America's Beauty Show in the AM. I still have to curl this mop of hair. So i guess I'll do that and rock out. Hope the curls won't fall out completely. :D

Tata!

Angela

Lost and Found.

I've given up on love.
Cause LOOOVES given up on me.

What feels better than a long summer day, a freshly tanned feeling, and knowing you have a day off tomorrow? RHETORICAL.

I can't flippin' wait for summer. Something about fall/winter is that SADisorder. YUCK. Winter blues SUCK! Something about country music puts me in that summer-y mindset. Anyone else? Maybe, it's all those, summer, tequila, baseball songs? Maybe...

I tootally am ready for these spring days to start sticking! March 11th is the time switch and lemme tell ya... CAN'T FRICKEN WAIT.

I know I'm going to lose an hour.. but really... I'm gaining an hour. :) Feel Me?

Anyone been to Boston? I'm thinking that might be my Spring trip. I was hoping for Dallas but can't really commit to that. I need some good ole country sometimes. Not that I can eat the BBQ.. but hey! maybe I'll get lucky and meet some amazing (not a hick) cowboy! ;) Bow chicka wow wowwww! That's what I'm talkin' about ya'll!

Who are we kidding, I need someone northern. Way northern. Like, Minocqua northern. OH YEEEAAHHHH.

Hey, a girl can dream.

Actually! Scratch that! I need to go to New Orleans! PRONTO! Anyone wanna come? I need some fun people, that reaaaally like RUM! :D How about Nawlins! I gotta check out that city. I might, probably, definitely NOT come home. I think I'll fall in love. CAJON MAAAN. :)

Well, I'm going to go dream about Nawlins! :D

Tata!

Angela

Problem?

Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.

GO.

What a day. What a roller coaster of emotions!!

Ending on an OK note though, so I guess life is pretty good.

What is considered a "horrible lie?"

Been asking myself a lot of questions. Been questioning everything. Surprise, surprise.
I find, that with every birthday, I get a little more honest. I don't think it's a bad thing to be honest. Ami right? Brutally honest is another thing. But it's better than lying I think. Probably for the bad lies. You don't wanna sugar coat things. Especially when you're telling a huge lie. Day by day. More and more lies. Maybe the truth really will set you free. But are you being a good person? Are you in the right, for telling so many harsh lies to keep others happy? Is that selfless? Or just plain stupid?

What happens when its your family? Do you lie to protect them? Or are you actually causing more problems for yourself? I just told you how honest I'm being. So clearly, I'm not the one lying. I just have a hard time deciding which side I'm on. Happy on the pappy lying side. You are being a good person. But I'm not happy, because you're a liar. And hiding.

Relief and then grit. There's no easy solution to life. There's no easy solution to problems. Everyone's got em. All is fair in love and war. Or maybe it's the opposite... thoughts?

There's nothing really fair about it. How do you deal with a broken heart? I can't even begin to love again. Picking up the pieces is just the first part of it. I'm not ready to be warm again. I can't deal with someone's baggage if they can't accept mine. Which, everyone's got it.

"Never love anything that can't love you back."


And that just broke it...

"My abandoned heart. Just doesn't understand. My undying love for you. Won't let me wait."

Gravitate.

Im in summer mode. Actually, I'm more in a mode where I'm doing whatever I can to think of summer. Wearing summer dresses, an ankle bracelet, drinking malibu and pineapples... Life is good. But it could be summer. That would make it better.


Been talking a ton about travelling... I'm already failing at my New Year's Resolution. Dang. Sucks. I haven't travelled at all. I know I'll be up north in July. But time is ticking by and I haven't requested any time off. Or even thought of a trip. I need a travel buddy...

Well, I've had far too many drinks to complete this blog. I had a lot to talk about. But I lost it all. WAH WAH!

Tata!

Angela

WANTS > needs

Hello there.

It's been some time. Bizaaaar to have so much happen in a week. There's so much change that has been happening and I'm adjusting. Truthfully.

How amazing is it to finally see what and who your priorities are? My birthday has come and gone. As I was drinking and speaking it became very clear who was very important in my life. My very loyal friends asked me where's so and so?! I answered truthfully...

*Shrug* "Honestly, I love my friends. Don't get me wrong, it sucks that they're not here. But everyone that I really care about and love is here. My family is the most important thing to me."

I think the alcohol was very sincere that night. The older I get, the less I have to fear with my mouth. When you tell the truth, you have nothing to hide. No secrets.


Anyone love the free feelings in life? Maybe it's getting out of work. Maybe its taking a spin in your car. I love all free feelings. Free to do what I want. Free to make my own judgment calls. Free to the worrrld. Including being naked. :)

Wants and Needs are SO different. Do you find yourself Needing! or Wanting! more? I find it's more needs lately. It's essential to eat. It's essential to wear socks in winter. It's essential to get some sleep. Or is that more of a want? I would say that having only WANTS, never NEEDING anything is a little bit more high maintenance. Someone recently told me they didn't ever NEED anything. I was kinda thinking... hm... okay prima donna! In your life, if you only NEED something, wouldn't that be a little more... understanding?

Might just be me. Either way, I'm into the essentials for now. Simplifying my life and getting my head back. It's good to feel...relaxed? Finally, the thoughts are starting to sort out and life is getting simpler! Who would've guessed? Maybe I need to drink more wine. It tends to help with everything. Not a question. It just does... :D

Tata For Now!

Angela



In vino veritas.


Mi piace amare. Ma io non voglio amare, oggi.

EVE.

How amazing. I just love Hawaii. Do you have any places you need to see, ASAP? Hawaii is definitely at the top of my list. There's something very comforting about hawaii, to me. I love the flowers, the culture, the language. Gosh, it sounds so soft for consonants! Beautiful!

Today, I found some peace. I was relaxed. I spent time vegging out and catching up on all my shows. It felt really good to just be in the moment without really having to worry about anything for hours. Then work came. But I don't want to talk about work. Trying to stay out of work, when I'm out of work.

Tomorrow is Valentine's Day! :D

Who is pumped up? I'm a little excited to just get on a chocolate high. I also really can't wait to see who's love blossoms! I will play cupid. In that, I will accept chocolate and gifts for love advice. Yep. Ending that there...

Any romance this Valentine's Day? :)

I work. It's sort of, my late day. I might have to go get myself a lobster tail, though. I deeeeffinitely deserve that. Then I'll probably watch some Dog the Bounty Hunter. What could be better? I fricken love Tuesdays.

Well, just sittin, waitin, wishin. Wish me luck! All could go swimmingly... or blow up completely. :D

Tata!
Angela



She dreamed of Para- Para- Paradise.

Sad.

I can keep busy all day, but when you have to come home to go to bed... It hits.

I really wonder if there is someone that is your soul mate. What if the one person that got away, reallllyy truly was the one.

I can't sleep. I can't eat. I can't sit in my skin.

I find myself having an inner battle. I want to sit around and pretend like I don't care. But I'm too much of an honest person to allow myself to play games. I can't be harsh and cruel to people I care about. Don't get me wrong, I don't allow myself to be taken advantage of. Honestly, it might be considered taking advantage of you. But I can't ignore people the way I used to. I have too much respect for people. I'm trying to change the world one person at a time.

I feel sick.

I hate being ignored. I can deal with everyone having the spotlight, everyday. But my birthday is pretty friggin special to me. I keep thinking how I'm going to lose it this year. I don't know if I can keep it together. When you have life you are so grateful for, and the one person you want to acknowledge you DOESNT... I draw the line. Tomorrow is February 13th. The eve of the 2nd most special day to me. I can spread my cheer to everyone... But I can't make people do something. Gosh, I really hope this plays out the way I want it to.

Sick of sitting, waiting, wishing. I'm not looking. Just hopeful.

I'll always have Italy. :)

Tata
Angela

Weeks.

There's something sexy about a car. Wouldn't you say? I love a sexy sexy muscle car. MMmmMmMmmmm...


Always been a Camaro girl at heart. You bet. 1969 was the BEST year for cars. So amazing to look at the Chevelles, Camaros and Chargers. Sexiness in a hood. MmMmmmmMmMmmm...

On that note! Who's going to the Auto show this year?! I ammmmm!!! I can't wait. I hope I'm in a magazine. That would be awesome! :D

I've been having some bizaaaaar dreams. Wheelchairs, pork chops and being homeless? Weird?

Homeless
To dream that you are homeless indicates that you are feeling insecure. You are unsure of yourself and where you are headed.

Wuh oh. That can't be good. But I woke up feeling so happy and excited to start the day. Weird... Maybe it means I don't know where I'm headed with my love life? eh? eh? That is a mystery. Considering I am in no way, shape, form able to understand what I need/want, how am I capable of loving again? RHETORICAL. (Per usual.)

Pork

To see or eat pork in your dream signifies your desire for routine and normalcy. Alternatively, the dream may be a pun on overspending.

Well, that makes sense. I don't feel normal at all. I can't get a normal routine in work or life. Which I'm okay with, maybe one day of the week. Plus, I am overspending. But! It's my birthday (week), dammit! I deserve it! RIGHT!?!

The whole wheelchair dream, I can begin to guess what that means. We'll just leave that alone. :)

I have to drink the rest of this wine and take a bath. It's a necessity. HELLOOOOOOOO.

Tata!
Angela

P.S. I love you.


You might think that I'm crazy.
But you know I'm just your type.
There's a spark in between us.
You feel like paradise.
Hold it against me.

Secrets. Secrets.

Secrets secrets are lots of fun, but should you tell anyone?

My current dilemma in life.

It's funny, the deeper the secret, the more I don't want to tell anyone. I can't tell if it's a good thing or not. Secrets are usually secrets for a reason. But I feel like secrets are always something you want to share. Is it to compare stories so that you don't feel bad in any way? Or maybe to help someone rationalize your thinking? Could be. Anyone else? I know I can't be alone.

I find myself noticing things. Is it coincidence? I don't think so. I feel like I'm getting indirect messages. I can't be insane. I can't stand guessing and waiting and hoping. I'm pretty sure I'm right about this one. Moving on!

How does everyone feel about dreams? My dreams are crazy lately! What the heck does it mean!! Wait, i think it all makes sense now.. Bizaaaaar.

Any people that are superstitious? This is the meaning on this blog. All about superstition and sublimmenal messages. Spelled that one wrong. Oh well!

I'll edit this later! :) Enter sandman.

Tata!
Angela

Game on.

I smiled a lot today. There's no way someone (especially a man) is going to put me down. Game on, baby. Game on.

What I love about men, and hate. They're oblivious. I know us chicks can over-analyze and be a crazed female. But I know you're playing games with me. As much as I hate playing them (sometimes) you're gonna get it right back. Starting now. I think I made myself pretty clear in previous conversations and blogs, I won't play them. I think my honesty really was stated the entire time. So I hope you're happy. :) I know I am.

By the way, you know the deal. You know what you have to do.

Birthday plans are boomin'! I'm so excited for all the yummies! Can't wait to eat and drink and be merry! So curious what will happen with Valentine's Day as well. I better have some secret admirers! ;) By secret admirers, I mean my best friends sending eachother flowers and cards. :) Kind of...

Is everyone feeling okay? I have been consistantly sick for about...3? months?

Sucks, so anyways. Let's chat!

Romance is on the brain!

I've noticed that chivalry (gallant warriors or gentlemen) is dead. Anyone else feeling that way? I find it hard to find a gentleman. Sad. Chicks notice this. Maybe I'm just too southern for you northern people. Or maybe I should look for a latino. They seem to excel in romance and etc. 0:D Or maybe just an older guy? I'm thinking my cap is 30. I think thats reasonable. I am going to be 23 this year. So... what does everyone think? I don't want to get married, fyi. Just looking to be swept is all. If someone can change my mind, I might accept this. :) CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.

Superbowl, eh?

Didn't watch much. BUT! I did get a lot done. Including, getting my DRANK on. :)

Lets chat! :D I'm wide awake on my Saturday night.

Tata! Hasta Manana!

Angela


P.S. Where a girl loves a boy. And a boy loves a girl. La Isla Bonita

My Soul

What is it about the forbidden that make us want it more? Rhetorical. There's a few answers. The temptation just gets us. Everything is so much greener on the other side. I played my favorite game today.

What if.

What if we left? What if I really did win? What if I really did fall for you? What if you really loved me? What if I got married? What if you never heard from me again? What if she doesn't...

What if you were mine? What if I was yours?

Enough!

I don't have much to talk about anymore. My hair is green. It's finally getting longer. I think I'll just keep letting it grow until it doesn't grow anymore. Sound like a plan? That's all I got. I can hardly keep my eyes open. Wish me luck that I can actually sleep now...

Tata
Angela




I can't sleep, I can't speak to you, I can't sleep.

Crack.

Split. Burst. Fall.

Love is fantastic. It makes it worth the heartache at the end. Or was that really love? Still waiting on the definition of love. I like using enamored. Or smitten. Smitten is so cute. It's like first love or love at first sight. :)

Valentine's Day gets me very excited. I hope everyone puts their heart into their love that day. I hope everyone feels loved and wanted. Everyone deserves to be loved, Valentine's Day could be the best day of the year to share how you really feel. Why don't people live with their heart on their sleeve everyday of the year? I love honesty. :)

How do you celebrate Valentine's Day?

How are men different from women? Besides the obvious sex difference. All day I wonder what if. It really isn't a fun game. I don't suggest it. I try to stay away from it but tend to go back. Lets just drop it.


This is my goodbye.
You can find out what you need.
I don't want to be with you.
Please don't hurt me now.
My heartbreaks whenever you are around.
I wanted to be with you forever.
In my heart I am yours forever.

Everyday its start to finish. Finish to start. It'll never change.

Tata...

Angela